New Year New Me?: Starting a New Chapter

I have never been one to believe in New Year’s resolutions because honestly most of the time they end up in failure anyway. I think setting yourself goals (i.e improving your grades, getting a new job, saving up for a new computer, writing a book etc.)  you want to achieve within the months to come is great but resolutions have never been for me because I’m a firm believer in continuous change. It’s your life and if you want to change something about it or change something about yourself you can work on getting that change whenever you feel like you’re ready. You don’t need a new year to do so, at least  that’s what I think. But if you’re of one the people who do like to make resolution for the new year then you do you, honey. Each to their own!

Needless to say I have never really made a list of resolutions but I do want to set some personal goals for 2018. I feel like this year is going to be an exciting yet scary year for me because I know a lot is going to change. I recently finished my BA degree and I am now waiting on my diploma, so I can apply for real grown up adult jobs. It’s been a few months since I’ve handed in my BA thesis yet I still can’t believe I’m now officially a college graduate. Sometimes it feels like I only graduated high school just yesterday and now I’m already finished with my first degree. Now I have to really figure out want I want to do with my life, find a job and look for MA programs. It’s exciting because one chapter of my life has come to an end and a new one is starting but it’s also nerve-wrecking and scary at the same time because at this point my future is entirely unknown.

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My plan for the upcoming months is to find a job or internship in my field so I can gain some experience before hopefully starting an MA degree next fall. I really want to make 2018 all about focusing on pushing myself forward in terms of work and academics. In the past few months I’ve been working in retail to make some money while waiting for my diploma and looking into possible jobs/programs. I’ve been wanting to start working on applications for so long yet most of the time I couldn’t get myself to really get into it. I think my biggest problem is the fear of not being good enough since I don’t have a lot of work experience yet other than some student jobs in retail or smaller internships. So in 2018 I want to overcome my fears and try to gain as much experience and knowledge as I possibly can. Instead of being insecure about the inevitable change I’m facing I want to embrace it and make the most of it. Change can be very good and the fact that I’ve finished my BA degree also opens up lots of new opportunities for me and I can’t wait to see what 2018 has in store.

Whether you make resolutions or set yourself goals or you just wait and see what the new year brings I wish you all lots of success and hope you get to make the most out of 2018!

Happy New Year and lots of love,

Sophie

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Growing Up & Drastic Changes

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As you might be able to guess from the title toddy’s post is going to be a non beauty or fashion related type of post. If you follow me on Twitter you might know that I’m currently on a tiny little break from Uni and back home. Being home I’m much more aware of the time and what day it actually is so when I took a good look at the calendar I was pretty shocked it’s nearly May.This means it’s been almost a year since my High School graduation. One entire year. I still can’t get myself to actually believe that. It seriously feels like I was 16 just yesterday being the typical high school student loving life and trying to avoid the future. Now I’m 19 and I’m almost done with my first year of university. UNIVERSITY! How did this happen? When did I become this old (I know I’m not actually that old but you get the point, right?)

Last year around this time I had just finished all of my exams and I pretty much went out partying with my friends like every weekend. I wasn’t like miss popular but I definitely had a lot of friends and my social calendar was always filled with lots of fun stuff. Looking back I was pretty much having the time of my life to be honest.

When I found out that I got accepted into the University I wanted to go I was pretty ecstatic but it also changed my life drastically. I had to find a place to live (which I luckily did pretty fast) and get used to a completely different life. Now most people my age have the same issues but for whatever reason I decided it was a good idea to go study in the Netherlands and I moved there.

I’m now living on my own pretty much. I do share an apartment with 3 other girls but it is basically like living on my own still. My schedule is packed with lectures and seminars. It is freaking packed! From Monday through Wednesday I basically live on campus because I have classes almost all day. Whenever I don’t have classes I have to do assignments, read or do other stuff for uni and since I no longer live at home I have to remember to do grocery shopping and do the cooking, washing and cleaning.

It’s so weird having to think about what you want to eat each day and having spending your money on the right foods. I’ve noticed a bunch of things I was never really aware before but, damn, living healthy is so freaking expensive. I never really noticed that before because my mom would always cook for us, so I’d get a warm meal each day after coming home from school.

My social life isn’t really existing anymore. Whenever I have ‘free’ time I have to do laundry, go grocery shopping or spend I my time with blogging(a funny part. yay). I barely remember the last time I went out with friends. Wow. I used to go out every weekend and now it’s a big deal when I go out like once a month. It’s not that I don’t want to go out anymore, trust me, I do but having to keep up with uni and all the tasks that are coming along when moving out of your parents home is quite exhausting, so when I do have free time I much rather spend it chilling out with a good movie or a book.

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Don’t get me wrong I’m definitely not being whiny. All of these changes have brought a lot of good things with them as well. I love going to University. I feel like I’ve found the perfect study for me and I’m liking the path I’m walking on right now. I feel like I grew up a lot in the past couple of months. My parents seem to be taken me a lot more serioulys now whenever I talk about plans for my future because they see I actually know what I’m talking about and they know I will work hard to get where I want to go.

It’s just so crazy how much has changed in these past few months. I used to be a care free high school student, who was alway just off with friends partying it up and now I’m going to University, living on my own in a foreign country and I try really hard to keep my grades up. I used to be so afraid of the future back in school and having to live on my own but looking back after almost a year now I regret nothing. I feel like I’ve changed in a positive way. I’m still the fun and life loving girl I used to be just a bit more grown up. I’m much more responsible now and I feel like I finally found my path and an idea of what I want to do later in life.

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I guess what I’m trying to say with this post is if you’re somewhere in between a teenager and  adult and you are at that point in life where you have to make important decisions about your future and you might have to give up some fun parts of your life and work a bit harder always go for it. It will change you most likely in a  positive way. It definitely changed me in a good way. I’ve set my priorities and a good education is definitely one of them. But this didn’t mean I have to give up my friends and having fun. I still go out with them and do have fun. I might not do it as often as I used to but when I do get to see them it makes it even more special and so much more fun.

Have you experienced much change after high school? How did you deal with it?

– xx Sophie

A Day In Amsterdam

With exams finally being over this weekend was my first free weekend in about a month. At first I was planning on just doing nothing and chilling out to recover from exams but then I figured that’d be kinda boring. So I was thinking of what to do and then it came to me. I’ve been living in the Netherlands since last September now but I haven’t actually seen that much of the country except for the city I’m living in, which I really adore but I just wanted to see more. Amsterdam, the capital of the Netherlands, is about an hour and a half by train from here, so I decided to pack up a few things, go to the train station, buy a ticket and hop on the next train to Amsterdam.

I’m so glad I came up with this idea and that I went through with it. I just felt a little adventurous and I love traveling and checking out new places, so I just went for it. I usually don’t travel alone and I was a bit nervous that I’d catch the wrong train and end up God knows where but everything went fine and I had an amazing day exploring the city.

When I left it was actually quite chilly and cloudy outside but the second I arrived at Amsterdam Central Station the sun came out. So here are some pictures of this absolutely beautiful city.

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I think Amsterdam just became one of my favorite cities in Europe. It is such a beautiful place. They have the cutest little houses and there’s all these canals. Unfortunately I didn’t have enough time to do one of those canal tours but I sure am doing one next time. Amsterdam is such a lovely and charming city I can’t get over it.

I’ve been to Amsterdam before but only once when I was a bout three years old. We still have a picture of me running around in tiny little rubber boots chasing doves. This time I obviously didn’t run around chasing doves and luckily I didn’t need rubber boots because the weather was gorgeous. After walking around the harbour and looking over the canals I walked to the city centre and did a little bit of shopping. They have the coolest stores there. Thank God the University of Amsterdam doesn’t offer my study program because if I was living there I’d probably totally broke and instead of studying I’d be sitting near the water just watching the ships go by.

Okay, I think I’ve fallen a bit in love with Amsterdam and before I continue to bore you with my ramblings I’m just going to stop now. But yeah you’ve probably noticed by now that I’ve had an amazing day and I can’t wait to go back again.

Any of you ever been to Amsterdam?

Happy Sunday!

A Day In Town

Yesterday my best friend came to visit me over here and we had pretty much the best day ever. The weather was absolutely gorgeous and we had so much fun. After picking her up from the train station I gave her a little bit of a campus tour and showed her around my University.

At around 1pm we went to have lunch at this lovely restaurant, where you can sit on a rooftop and enjoy a beautiful view over the city.

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Then we did a little shopping and I picked up quite a few things including these:

Loved this dress and it was on sale.
Loved this dress and it was on sale.

 

Some lovely scarfs and this gorgeous little notebook
Some lovely scarfs and this gorgeous little notebook

 

Bought my first crop top.
Bought my first crop top.

 

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A little while later we treated ourselves to some ice cream and went down to the river side.

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We sat there for hours just talking and enjoy the warm sunshine and the pretty view. It was just one of the best day in a very long time and it was over way to fast.

Happy Friday, lovelies!

XX

College: An Emotional Roller Coaster Ride

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It’s official! I survived my first semester of college. This is just so crazy. It’s like just yesterday I turned sixteen and went to my first high school dance and now I’m 2 months away from turning 19 and my second semester starts on monday. MONDAY! I can’t believe how fast time is flying by. It’s almost scary. So much has happened in just this last year. I changed from an unsure and insecure high school student into a pretty ambitious college student, who finally somewhat knows what she wants.

Last year around this time I was about to graduate and all I wanted was for time to slow down. I was terrified of the future because I had no idea what I wanted to do after school. All I ever wanted since I was eleven was doing an exchange year in the US. I can’t explain why but it was my goal in life so after my year was finished and I was back home I was so clueless. I’ve achieved what I wanted and I no longer had something to work for. I wasn’t exactly bad in school. I was just average because I didn’t have a reason to be really good. I didn’t know what I was doing it all for.

When I found out that I could do American Studies in the Netherlands and that I would have a lot of opportunities with that study later I really wanted to do it, so when I got accepted I was so incredibly happy. I have to admit I was a little scared of moving to a different country again and being the odd one out, but now I know that it was all worth it. I’ve passed all of my exams so far and I’m doing really good. Actually I’ve never been this motivated to study and be successful. It feels so good to be great at something. Besides make-up and fashion I’ve always had a passion for writing. I’m not good with talking about my thoughts and feelings but writing helps me to express those. I love how you can create a story and maybe touch someone’s heart with it. Writing gives you a voice, that might be heard. When people see me most of them just see me as this little blonde fashion doll, I guess, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t write a good academic essay on a historical story, now does it? Because guess what! I got an A on my last one! I know a lot of people never expected something like that of me and it’s such an amazing feeling to prove them wrong.

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Now that I’ve finished my first semester I know I definitely made the right decision. Moving to the Netherlands to do American Studies is the best thing that I could’ve possibly done and I’m so glad I took this opportunity. In order to get accepted into my University I had to pass a Dutch State exam and before last summer I didn’t speak a single word of Dutch. Over the summer I worked my butt of to learn as much Dutch as possible and pass the state exam. My Dutch is still nowhere near fluent but I passed the exam and I got accepted.

Looking back on the last few months I don’t think I’ve ever been this emotional. It’s definitely been a roller coaster ride of emotions for me. I’ve had my ups and downs. Sometimes when I passed an important exam or got a really good grade on an assignment I felt like I was on top of the world, like I owned it, and the next day I failed an exam or assignment or had trouble fitting in, because of the language barrier, and all I wanted to do was cry and hide in my bed for the rest of my life. I felt like such a failure but despite all that it’s also been one of the best few months of my life. I’ve come to realise how good I can be at something if I really work hard. I’ve at least found a direction for my future. A goal I’m working towards. I’ve met some great new people. I’m actually genuinely happy! I sometimes miss my friends at home and communicating with people in Dutch is still hard for me, but it’s getting better every day. I think I’ve grown up a lot in the last few months living on my own most of the time having to face all of the challenges studying abroad brought along with it pretty much on my own.

I’m so so so glad I gave this all a shot though being totally scared and I’m looking forward to my second semester. If the rest of my college experience will be just as eventful I know it’ll be an experience that will change me in a lot of good ways. I know a lot of good times are ahead of me just as hard times. I’ll have to work hard to keep my grades up,  because the failure rate for an exam is about 50% each time, which I think is quite a lot. But whatever.. I’ve done it before so I’ll be able to do it again.

Wow. This post’s gotten a lot longer and more personal than intended, so I hope I didn’t bore anyone. I guess what I’m trying to say is just, if you’re being offered a great opportunity in life take it! It might be terrifying  as hell at first, but if you don’t take it you might end up regretting it. I know I would’ve missed out on a lot if I hadn’t done this. It’s been a challenge and it will continue to be a challenge but I know I don’t want this emotional roller coaster ride to end yet.

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Have a great Sunday! XX

I’M GOING TO CHICAGO

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Hey there people! I have some exciting news! So my University is offering this study trip to CHICAGO and I get to participate. This is basically the coolest thing ever! I would’ve wanted to go basically anywhere on a study trip but Chicago is literally my dream come true! I’ve been in love with this city ever since I was eleven. I have no idea why but one day I watched this documentary on Chicago and ever since then I’ve been so fascinated with this city. When I was twelve I started reading tons of books about Chicago and it was all I talked about all day. Soon I even started annoying everyone with my newly acquired knowledge.

‘Hey, mom! Did you know that the first skyscraper ever was built in Chicago? It only had like 10 floors.’

‘Yes, sweetie. You’ve only mentioned that about 9 times by now.’

I know this study trip won’t be all fun because I will have to take extra classes, on top of my usual classes, to learn all about Chicago’s history, architecture and politics but I’m honestly really looking forward to that.

I know this year’s just started but it’s been so good to me already. I got to celebrate into the new year in London, I passed some really important exams and now I’m going to go to Chicago in may. I feel so incredibly lucky to be offered such amazing opportunities and I still can’t quite believe it. I’ve been wanting to go to Chicago for seven years now and it’s about to happen. I must be one of the happiest people on earth right now.

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Anyway.. I just wanted to share this with you guys and I hope that your 2014 will be full of great opportunities and dreams come true.

XX